Phi Delta Theta Announces Carnival Cruise Theme Party

The Kentucky Epsilon chapter of Phi Delta Theta announced earlier today that it will be hosting the first annual Carnival Carnival tonight. The party, which will will incorporate facets of this week’s Carnival cruise fiasco, during which the cruise ship was stranded in the middle of the Gulf of Mexico for five days and needed to be towed back ashore. These facets will reportedly include, but will not be limited to, steamy temperatures, an overpowering stench, and a dancefloor covered in raw sewage. In addition, none of the toilets inside the house will be functional and one will even randomly spew out solid waste whenever anyone tries to flush it. Phi Delt social chair Grant Arrington explained, “we always try to do something a little new for our house parties. I realized that this theme would be a good way of incorporating current events into the college party scene.” Arrington added that some brothers have seemed skeptical as to the success of the rager, which will reportedly also include a mandatory hour-and-a-half wait for any mixed drinks. However, the social chair remains optimistic. “We’re still considering adding another twist, something along the lines of no one being allowed to leave until Tug Boat Pledge makes his way back from an undisclosed location. But even if that doesn’t work out and the party is a bust, worst case scenario we’ll just give everyone a Qdoba buy-one-get-one-free coupon on the way out.”

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by Jeff Lipscomb

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